Hysterics in a child of 3 years: causes, methods of prevention and counseling by a psychologist

The age of three is a special period in the life of a child and parents. It was at this time that many adults especially often experience hysterical seizures.

The child screams, falls to the ground, beats his head against a wall or floor, refuses to fulfill the request of his mother or father. Parents, of course, are lost and do not always understand how to deal with children's tantrums. In some children, sudden bouts of bad mood quickly pass, others may hysteria for years.

What to do? Psychologist's advice will help you to respond correctly to the whims and find an approach to a screaming child.

What is hysteria?

Experts advise to distinguish between hysterical seizures and moods. The last child most often resorts specifically, wanting to get the right object, the attention of an adult or something forbidden or inaccessible.

What is hysterics?A capricious child often cries, screams, stomping feet, scattered toys. Usually the moods are found in babies from one year to three years.

Hysterical seizures are often involuntary, since the child cannot cope with emotions. At first, it began, like whims, with loud crying, screaming, hysterics, accompanied by an additional beating of the head on various surfaces, self-injury (scratching the face).

In especially difficult situations, a child in 3 years manifests convulsive syndrome, which is also accompanied by arching (“hysterical bridge”).

Child tantrum- the strongest emotional response arising from a child in response to a ban, a nuisance, supported by irritation, anger, aggression, directed at himself or others.

The main feature of this seizure is the increased reaction with the attention of outsiders.

Child psychologists identify three main stages of a hysterical attack in a child of three years old, who successively follow each other:

  1. Shouts.The child is just screaming very loudly, while not demanding anything. Many adults at first are frightened of such manifestations, then they begin to determine the onset of the next attack. At this stage, the crumb is already noticing the people around it.
  2. Motor arousal.If the child is not reassured in the first stage, he begins to run, stomp his feet, knock his fists on the table, fall on the floor, tear his hair out or beat his head against the wall. At such moments, the baby does not feel pain.
  3. Sobs.The child is crying desperately, the tears literally flow "river." If he had not been soothed before, then the whimpers and offended glances thrown at adults will continue for quite a long time - up to several hours.

Such emotionally saturated behavior greatly exhausts a child at the age of three. Therefore, after the seizure that has happened, the baby is exhausted and wants to sleep in order to gain strength.

Causes of Hysterical Seizures

Of course, it is necessary to somehow react to the behavior of a child who constantly rolls up unreasonable tantrums.

But what to do: to prevent, prevent, stop or punish, as a crime? Parental tactics should depend on provoking factors that lead to this situation.

Before considering the specific causes of hysterical seizures in a child of three years, you need to pay attention to the features of this age.

At 3 years old, the baby is experiencing another crisis moment. In psychological literature and practice, he even got his name - the crisis of three years.

At this time, the child gradually perceives itself as a separate personality - “I am not a mother.”

The kid also begins to understand that his desires do not coincide in many ways with the requirements of the parents, therefore the “conflict of interests” begins. A tantrum in the children's arsenal becomes the simplest and most effective tool in an attempt to be understood correctly.

In addition to the crisis of three years, which manifests itself in rebellion, stubbornness, the requirement of independence, there are other reasons for hysterical attacks:

  1. Causes of Hysterical SeizuresA child of three years is too poor vocabulary, so he is not yet able to express in words his thoughts, requests and wishes. And if he is also spoiled, then he can only bring the demands through hysterics.
  2. The vagaries of a young child usually begin after adults refuse to buy the desired toy, to go to any place. By a similar method, a child in three years tries to get his parents to fulfill his demand.
  3. Hysterical behavior occurs in children who have just recently born a brother or sister. All the attention of parents, grandmothers and other close people is concentrated on the baby, and the firstborn is jealous, feeling that his rightful place belongs to a tiny little man.
  4. Another common cause of hysterics at the age of three is banal exhaustion. The child spent time in kindergarten, then went shopping with his mother, then went to visit, where he played with other children in active games. It is not surprising that after such a busy day, tantrums begin.
  5. The child may simply be unwell, and express his unsatisfactory state through hysterical attacks. Children usually behave this way from year to 3 years, however, even three-year-old children, especially if they cannot tell about their state of health, unconsciously resort to this method.
  6. Another provoking factor may be the unwillingness of the child to stop an interesting activity. For example, a child plays in kindergarten with other children, is busy, satisfied, and his mother wants to take him away with her. As a result, the child falls to the ground and knocks.
Even if you establish a circumstance provoking a hysteria, it is necessary to understand that the little tot does not want to annoy you or do something on purpose.

At this time, the child is not yet able to “turn on” the emotional regulator, so each of his strong emotions can eventually grow into a full-fledged hysterical attack.

How to be parents?

If you understand the historical attack, as a means to attract the attention of the child to his person, then adults should, first of all, teach him to express their desires in a more civilized way.

Also, the child must understand that such behavior is an inefficient method of communicating about their needs.

And so that you can unobtrusively draw a child with such conclusions, you need to properly respond to emotional outbursts, adhering to a well-thought-out plan of action.

So, what to do and how to be an adult, if a child has a hysterical fit:

How to be parents

  1. You can not panic, demonstrate that such ugly behavior disturbs you at least. Often children's hysteria is joined by the maternal one, which only intensifies the emotional explosion and inflames passions.
  2. Be sure to try to figure out what exactly served as a "provocateur" hysterical attack. Sometimes it is enough to save a child from tedious trips to guests, less include various computer toys or cartoons.If the reason is in indisposition, it is necessary to consult a doctor.
  3. It is best to simply ignore the emotional outburst. Of course, one should not leave a child in three years alone or in a public place, but be in the field of children's sight, while remaining indifferent. Usually an attack quickly comes to the final, if there are no grateful spectators.
  4. Do not give in to a child if hysterical seizures are necessary to get something. Kids quickly understand how to take advantage of the situation, so they begin to manipulate tears and screams, especially if mom is embarrassed about such attacks.
  5. In the initial stage, when the child can still hear you, you can try to talk, explain, distract with some action or a bright object. Sometimes these distracting maneuvers work.
  6. If the child is sensitive to tactile contact, during an attack you can embrace it, press it to yourself, whisper tender words in a low voice. This will help prevent self-injury, as some children tend to hurt themselves.

Punishments during hysterical seizures will not improve the situation.All educational conversations and disciplinary methods need to begin only after everything settles down.

What to do after hysterics?

Many parents have no idea how to deal with a child after a past hysterical attack. If emotional explosions happen all the time, happen both at home and in kindergarten, then you will have to teach your child the proper ways to express their mood.

Immediately after the tantrum, you need to explain to the child how his behavior has grieved you. It is the behavior, not the kid himself. Demonstrate that you still adore him, but you want to be proud of him every minute, and not only when he behaves well.

The child needs to explain with a real example how exactly it is necessary to show various emotional manifestations - anger, anger, irritation, happiness or ecstasy. The kid must understand that to achieve the desired thing can not only roar and jerk legs.

Perhaps this “science” will take a week or two or three months. The duration of the training will depend on the temperament of the child. Small choleric people are more prone to hysterical attacks due to the mobile nervous system than sanguine and phlegmatic children.Melancholics, too, can fall into hysterics, but it will pass without excessively violent manifestations of emotions.

When do I need to contact specialists?

Most often, parents independently cope with bouts of hysteria in a 3-year-old child. However, in some situations one cannot do without the support of a psychologist or even a doctor.

If hysterical seizures in a baby occur regularly for a month or longer, it can be assumed that the child has any neurological disease.

When you need to contact specialists

Consultations and advice of a neurologist are needed if:

  • during seizures, the child loses consciousness or he stops breathing;
  • after hysteria, the baby begins dyspnoea, vomiting, he becomes sluggish, it tends to sleep;
  • attacks become more frequent and worse;
  • the child injures itself or relatives (caregivers in the garden);
  • hysteria combined with other psychological disorders (phobias, mood swings, night fears);
  • the child continues to hysteria at four years or five years.
If these symptoms are absent, but children's actions continue to alarm you, the best solution will be advice and counseling by a psychologist.

That's why you should contact a psychological center to discuss a possible solution.

Preventive measures

Hysterics often occur in children aged three years. And they are easier to prevent than to fight with them. The main tips relate to streamlining the daily routine, bringing the requirements of parents and grandmother to the child to uniformity and work on themselves.

  1. Preventive measuresIt is important to correctly dose both psychological and physical stress received by the baby throughout the day. This applies, in particular, to modern cartoons. A child of three years is still not able to properly perceive various special effects, a quick change of pictures and an abundance of storylines and characters.
  2. Observe sleep and wakefulness. The three-year-old child must be laid in time in bed and at night, and during the day. It is especially important not to miss daytime sleep, it will help reduce the load.
  3. Both grandmothers and parents are obliged to observe uniform requirements to the child. Some grandmothers “sin” by starting to fulfill every whim of a baby, which takes advantage of similar circumstances. Therefore, you need to discuss all the rules of behavior with the child, but that both the spouse and grandparents also adhere to such prohibitions and restrictions.
  4. Teach your child to voice emotions: “Are you offended now?”, “Why are you upset?”, “Why are you angry?” Signing mood with words helps children gradually understand their feelings and tell about them. In addition, in this way, gradually you will be able to teach your child to control emotions.
  5. Be sure to monitor children's reactions in order to detect in advance the signs of an impending hysterical attack. For example, someone raises his voice, another clenches his fists, sniffs, the third begins to whimper or purse his lips. Such “precursors” will help to shift the child’s attention to an object or, for example, a running dog.
  6. Psychological advice often applies to gaming activities, because during games and in kindergarten, and at home, the kid is most relaxed. With the help of dolls and your favorite teddy bear, you will be able to direct his emotions in the right direction, in an unobtrusive manner to demonstrate the desired behavior.
  7. What if a three-year-old child tries to do everything himself? It is necessary to allow him to dress himself, to get out by virtue of his capabilities, in general, to provide greater relative independence.First, let his actions be clumsy and unproductive, but he will become more confident.
  8. Try to share the really important children's desires and irrelevant moods. Perhaps the baby really needs to wear a red hat at the moment. And if you do not argue, then avoid a hysterical attack.
  9. Try to offer the child the right to choose from two possibilities that suit you equally. For example, does it matter what kind of suit he will be in today’s kindergarten.
  10. If a child starts hysteria at any of your attempts to pick up from the sandbox, turn off the TV, try to warn in advance that after 5-10 minutes you need to stop playing and get ready for evening sleep.

Psychologists are sure that it is practically impossible to completely defeat hysterical attacks in a child of three years old, but you can still warn them. Just communicate more with the peanut, learn to manage your mood. And if the baby continues to hysterics, seek advice and help from a competent specialist.

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